Now that everything is asleep, now that the silence has been placed on this house, I can tell you that I miss very much, that I do is rewind and concern that thin strip of the handful of memories. wonder how you were, who knows what you thought, I do not know ... I have an idea of \u200b\u200bmy own, but I know that this is the exact idea of \u200b\u200bwhat they were, a male fragile and full of sensitivity, sensibility hidden in that air gruff and grumpy, always with a cigarette in his mouth and eyes blinded by desire to redeem himself with his arms and large hands to grab onto if every moment, every subtle desire and ambition. My memories are very confused, but enough to see your face in trying to remember what your true voice, even if that voice in moments I heard my own and very true. I have a picture near here, I have billions of your things, disks, pens and papers that they know more about you. wonder how you have been strong to overcome everything that you deleted. I can not find you in another man, I can not hope that the heart be still, but I can only remember and hold on the heart near me. How love when someone is gone? I remember you and I can only say I love you so much and the music that you left me, enough to not feel alone anymore, because I know somewhere you're still struggling to me.
You should know that my mother had a friend quite a bit younger than she, this girl is separated and has a son my age, this guy had to go back to hometown for some things. This guy has (had) a beautiful cat named Felix, unfortunately, living with other roommates (who absolutely did not want this poor cat) has asked us kindly if we could address it for a few days waiting behind it shortly after. You have to see this great big cat, is fatal to die, it behaves like a true predator, is big in size is the same age muffler with the only difference is that about twice and loves to sit on the balcony. My mother passed the days when Felix was staying here temporarily, call her friend who, without hair (cat) on the tongue tells .. "My son does not want the cat, his housemates threaten to throw him out of the house if the cat back" My mother and I decided to take Felix that changed as well, Cagliostro, a bit like the cat in ink, so called because it is completely black, or rather black / blue, has a pair of big eyes big and yellow like the moon, in short, the classic black Gattaccia impressive and healthy film about witches (good though). The first few days have been traumatic enough for pot, you had to see it was all offended, Cagliostro did nothing but pull his monstrous paw, knocking him out of bed in the evening, since the muffler was used to sleeping next to me leaning on the pillow like an angelic guardian, now they play and sleep together, muffler can no longer sleep in my chair dejected, but of course has changed their attitude, after she peed everywhere have decided to become friends, but only because the black cat (damn smart and a bit) decided to ally with him, unfortunately, has become the dominant male, you want to put the month in which the most difference, either for the rating that is double that. Cagliostro is a cat, bold, sensual and combative, she loves to sit on the balcony and saw that our balcony is quite large, does not hesitate to climb over the network to go to roost on the hood venting, practically curled to the moon on the fireplace which consistently produces steam, Unlike most wild muffler though, is much more crafty and cuddly, slips under the covers and shamelessly begins with his Ronfi Ronfi whenever the slightest relief .... So now in my bed there are two principles, one black and one blue, and perfectly reflect the main and opposite sides of my character. but MIAO!
Placido Felsina, dell'uggiosa race, holy god such as weirs and push, god tired as you cry and scream, look , amazed not think for the love of the stars that never will be all yours, not think for the love of giiovinezza lost, because she never return, will never turn the stones and the leaves dance. Look how bright and vivid, feel like singing high and imposing, what is it? hate
or simple surrender to love not to live, sleep the joy that brings you the instant before you shut your eyes? jumps and turns, weirs drunk you get up again and then ask again, because nothing can sated altogether, perhaps a flight epic and infinity, but nothing that is not only you, only that image with whom you love even billions of times, until the time is not wasted and does not fade. As long as the cock cominzia not to sing until that heart does not rot in a few words, that not even care so they would know this far, then not speak for God ever, or simply for love of you ...
"I'm here, and it happened yesterday, I do not remember very well, death comes when you take away, but with you also drain all your memories. I just remember that the moment was not too bad, so sudden. I have not seen his good form, I heard only the slow sensation of abandonment, that bitter sweet taste, the taste of a moment that you know will not come back. About me came as a warm caress, a hint of motherly and warm a bit like when I was still inside my mother. unthinkable things I remembered that I had forgotten so much time that I could not even comprehend. At that moment I heard the voice of myself desperately trying to fight, one of those voices you hear when you know you are really in danger. Mouth is filled with metal, the head gave me a slight buzz. I have not heard, even if I had to do, I locked in a small space muffled and dark, where it is trapped. And it happened, my soul is detached from the body back, that body for some moments before evacuation was agitated, he did a lot wrong, and say who say that death should result in peace. I gave an absolute nuisance when I left I felt like just out of the washing machine, but without the evil as before, only more cumbersome, as if gravity had changed in a nano second, it was difficult to understand what were in my arms, the light was really too much. The doctors are courses soon after that my body has stopped having seizures. The chief of cardiology has tried everything, took shots at my chest for at least twelve minutes, tried to make me breathe again, in my mind came the panic in the running as a runaway horse, the down force was tremendous, but then I managed to free myself from that thought, I can not tell if it was more like a thought or a feeling. did not come back from her, was too ugly to view outside, I was really so? Really I spent all those months in those conditions? should make a memorandum of death for the terminally ill, should give you the choice to leave without evil and the pain that I took with me from behind. now is the pain in my chest that I moved on my shoulder and runs along the back, is the same evil that is when you stay in bed too, one of those unbearable tingling that spreads repititivamente. The doctor who has followed me throughout the hospital, I was covered with my blanket, I went with him when he told me. My father and sister were the first to cry, but my mother has turned to white and then blood He must have gone all the way to the face. He did not say anything was limited only to nod. I felt like crying myself when my sister, younger than me, I embraced it. is was horrible, I felt his arms about me, her hot tears fall on top on the neck. He wanted to stay with me, has also opened the bedroom window, looked out into the trees orange and yellow, then looked at the green grass and damp, maybe he was about to jump from the window, but when I tried to support the hand on his shoulder, he must have heard me, and he changed his mind, call it telepathy or just willpower, but she was able to hear me. She sat next to me, it did not go away when they took me in the basement, in the mortuary chapel. it was she who decided to dress me. What made me cry from the legs, what I put on my twenty-fifth birthday. I was really beautiful. the function were all there, Gianluca and Katia, the Alice and Henry, missing from Mark, and I realized, I did not have power at all, but I know he was what I was most attached, was that to which I was a little bit as a psychologist. We know how to do it with friends, the important thing is to always be able to listen to them, the solution is not very important, but the important thing is to make him feel you are there, even after you're dead. They took me in the cemetery next to the house, Philip Conlie played guitar throughout the mass, the song that I had asked, that of Jeff Buckley that I liked so much, but to tear trailer was perfect. My mom had destroyed the faces, you could see he did not sleep the night before, the night when I'm dead. I died in autumn, my favorite season, the season when the streets feel the smell of chestnuts and mulled wine. What a nice the Ilaria, next to all the flowers we put a nice red candle with the Cheshire side. Smoke wonder how he is, tried a lot to me, that cat was the best thing that had happened to me in the last years of my life. I had taken to the cattery, my mother had insistinto lot, believed that pet therapy has the power to heal completely. I'll miss his little legs in the hair and the hum of his purring before falling asleep. There are also my former classmates, there was incredible how many people there were really all in the church there was not. I've moved to the funeral, I was next to my dead body all the time, close to the black pine coffin with inlays of gold, just like what I had seen in the movie house of Gianluca. Don Benigno could not even speak, and say that there are young people who die every five minutes at least in the world, but perhaps what has made me cry was the rage to all who have always had that hope, to the hope that they had in my comparisons, I could really do it ...."
