Placido Felsina, dell'uggiosa race, holy god such as weirs and push, god tired as you cry and scream, look , amazed not think for the love of the stars that never will be all yours, not think for the love of giiovinezza lost, because she never return, will never turn the stones and the leaves dance. Look how bright and vivid, feel like singing high and imposing, what is it? hate
or simple surrender to love not to live, sleep the joy that brings you the instant before you shut your eyes? jumps and turns, weirs drunk you get up again and then ask again, because nothing can sated altogether, perhaps a flight epic and infinity, but nothing that is not only you, only that image with whom you love even billions of times, until the time is not wasted and does not fade. As long as the cock cominzia not to sing until that heart does not rot in a few words, that not even care so they would know this far, then not speak for God ever, or simply for love of you ...
"I'm here, and it happened yesterday, I do not remember very well, death comes when you take away, but with you also drain all your memories. I just remember that the moment was not too bad, so sudden. I have not seen his good form, I heard only the slow sensation of abandonment, that bitter sweet taste, the taste of a moment that you know will not come back. About me came as a warm caress, a hint of motherly and warm a bit like when I was still inside my mother. unthinkable things I remembered that I had forgotten so much time that I could not even comprehend. At that moment I heard the voice of myself desperately trying to fight, one of those voices you hear when you know you are really in danger. Mouth is filled with metal, the head gave me a slight buzz. I have not heard, even if I had to do, I locked in a small space muffled and dark, where it is trapped. And it happened, my soul is detached from the body back, that body for some moments before evacuation was agitated, he did a lot wrong, and say who say that death should result in peace. I gave an absolute nuisance when I left I felt like just out of the washing machine, but without the evil as before, only more cumbersome, as if gravity had changed in a nano second, it was difficult to understand what were in my arms, the light was really too much. The doctors are courses soon after that my body has stopped having seizures. The chief of cardiology has tried everything, took shots at my chest for at least twelve minutes, tried to make me breathe again, in my mind came the panic in the running as a runaway horse, the down force was tremendous, but then I managed to free myself from that thought, I can not tell if it was more like a thought or a feeling. did not come back from her, was too ugly to view outside, I was really so? Really I spent all those months in those conditions? should make a memorandum of death for the terminally ill, should give you the choice to leave without evil and the pain that I took with me from behind. now is the pain in my chest that I moved on my shoulder and runs along the back, is the same evil that is when you stay in bed too, one of those unbearable tingling that spreads repititivamente. The doctor who has followed me throughout the hospital, I was covered with my blanket, I went with him when he told me. My father and sister were the first to cry, but my mother has turned to white and then blood He must have gone all the way to the face. He did not say anything was limited only to nod. I felt like crying myself when my sister, younger than me, I embraced it. is was horrible, I felt his arms about me, her hot tears fall on top on the neck. He wanted to stay with me, has also opened the bedroom window, looked out into the trees orange and yellow, then looked at the green grass and damp, maybe he was about to jump from the window, but when I tried to support the hand on his shoulder, he must have heard me, and he changed his mind, call it telepathy or just willpower, but she was able to hear me. She sat next to me, it did not go away when they took me in the basement, in the mortuary chapel. it was she who decided to dress me. What made me cry from the legs, what I put on my twenty-fifth birthday. I was really beautiful. the function were all there, Gianluca and Katia, the Alice and Henry, missing from Mark, and I realized, I did not have power at all, but I know he was what I was most attached, was that to which I was a little bit as a psychologist. We know how to do it with friends, the important thing is to always be able to listen to them, the solution is not very important, but the important thing is to make him feel you are there, even after you're dead. They took me in the cemetery next to the house, Philip Conlie played guitar throughout the mass, the song that I had asked, that of Jeff Buckley that I liked so much, but to tear trailer was perfect. My mom had destroyed the faces, you could see he did not sleep the night before, the night when I'm dead. I died in autumn, my favorite season, the season when the streets feel the smell of chestnuts and mulled wine. What a nice the Ilaria, next to all the flowers we put a nice red candle with the Cheshire side. Smoke wonder how he is, tried a lot to me, that cat was the best thing that had happened to me in the last years of my life. I had taken to the cattery, my mother had insistinto lot, believed that pet therapy has the power to heal completely. I'll miss his little legs in the hair and the hum of his purring before falling asleep. There are also my former classmates, there was incredible how many people there were really all in the church there was not. I've moved to the funeral, I was next to my dead body all the time, close to the black pine coffin with inlays of gold, just like what I had seen in the movie house of Gianluca. Don Benigno could not even speak, and say that there are young people who die every five minutes at least in the world, but perhaps what has made me cry was the rage to all who have always had that hope, to the hope that they had in my comparisons, I could really do it ...."
"C'oh a hurt inside, it's right here between the ribs, below the sternum, I can not tell whether it is right or left, is a widespread evil, muffled like when you leave a place too noisy. If you think about it really, I say "but really?" do not ask me what it is, do not ask me why, but I'm damn evil remains, accompanied me for most of the day, the evening is felt more, perhaps arriving in the dark. The fact remains that when there is noise, and if I think too much all around my head. annoying this pain and I have been friends for quite some time before it was really unbearable, then I do not know why but he settled for good in the chest, just had to kick some for breaking direct, I will not have even noticed, I have not given weight, I left them privately, without even considering it was so only minimal pain and insignificant, those who you are and you do not notice even of those who think, "I? but are you crazy?". And then you want to for one thing and another, I have not given weight, in fact I do not give a shit just to be sure, a pain so I've tried in the past, and I had promised to do everything possible to prevent his return. But then I also noticed that in my little buggy and head, a pain like that was what I wanted, indeed, perhaps not, but that's what made me turn all perceptions toward something that is not me, to something that is not my fear. And now I am in this hospital bed waiting to die, the doctors have given me very little time, maybe some day, doubt a whole month, and I do not even want to be a whole month, in fact I wish it were now, now , a blow dry and firm, which makes noise when you open the watermelon ... crack. we said, this disease has changed me a lot, before ending up in hospital, I realized that I had changed a lot, I realized that I was interested less noise, but remained more focused on the feelings, so I'm doing a lot of friends , a lot of times more, but who really loved me noticed it and let it pass, he gave me his support in a silent way. Tomorrow I do not know if I can still write, this is the second night in hospital, the third is waiting for me tomorrow, but I'm sure that will not be able to pass it, tomorrow I'll be there again? ... maybe. But if I will, I know it will be the last week, the last hours in which this evil is not yet able to completely cover the heart, for now my head goes all out to send him away, but he always comes back ... "
Francis is just out of home, his blue car that evolved from the thousand intenperie is bringing in low. has two friends with whom you will see shortly, the appointment is for ten at the bar, where as usual there is all. not a boy hugs and kisses but not by beauty and poetry damn damn, apparently is a guy like ten thousand others on the ground. Eyes blacks, look uncertain, unkempt beard and hair as they are. has a particular taste in dress, a little retro, so much to make it look like a professor of philosophy too young. Francis had to beat cancer when he was just ventennne, an evil stupid to a stupid part of the body, the hand, the with which you do not grasp things I miss. The fact remains that this thing has forever marked, now complain less and when it does, is always with the intention of drawing attention to herself, because even if it seems so strong and so macho on the outside in the inside is a butter mountain zone, with a pinch of salt. Lord undecided, has never come forward with any woman, even someone who refuses to accept even arrived, and all for fear of the involvement of failure. He spent a few nights holed up in his small apartment, holed up like a mouse to look preposterous film in black and white, to cover things which are written the night before and to control the agenda and the next assignment. How much effort, yet it is not difficult to understand what he wants: Perhaps a more serene life, perhaps a woman and a little less bitchy bitch again of all those she met, maybe some more to add to the examination booklet, or ... Or a couple of coats shiny, silver-colored edge, than if it makes you look too bad to go to the brain. Try a terribly angry furious to see those of his age who are all already there, maybe one is already married and also has a son in the project. And Francis is swearing in front of his bitter spritz to creepy, has an insistent tune that hums in your ears for some day. The stomach does distract from that thought so macabre. Outside the window of the bar feels an uproar scoured preceded by a ferocious, and Alessio, the huge prick that took all of his DVDs, nearly two years ago still has not deigned to an "oh you will excuse them port as soon as I can "and then have the courage to organize an aperitif as well, as if nothing had happened ... poor bastard. Alessio after two or three spritz is fully revved up and invites him and Mark in his house, which is not so much about her. lives in a small town renovated the house next to his, and his parents, as everything is there, works hard, makes a metalworker and blowjob of cocaine that is a pleasure. Francis was always so envious of his pure lines to do, but Marco is a bit like him, much more transparent, but not because he is different, but only because he never had that anger inside. That anger has now wielding a baseball bat to Francis. That anger that Mark has stunned on the ground, while Alex is in the bathroom with a CD in the hands of Simon and Garfunkel and the other a small bag of white powder that was taken from the cookie jar. The music is so much higher that Alex does not even notice the crash, Francis was sitting in front of the glass table that looks at the red spots come from the face of Mark, spread all over the floor. Alex comes up with a face ruined by cocaine and incredibly while talking about something stupid and meaningless, slips back in slick red and sticky. has only a few moments before you know it really counts, the first to scream after watching his feet smeared with blood, before the hand of Mark clings to his suit in a desperate attempt to seek help. few moments, a few seconds of darkness and teeth splashing away in the race, out of the mouth. The strike is decided, you hear a nice crack, but not so dry that it breaks your head completely. does not even fainted, cocaine is sometimes very useful if you of that good, I completely numbs the palate and gums, even if now your teeth and your gums are all one with the decor. Poor thing, they have made the big eyes while trying to keep the blood in the mouth, as if to put a hand in front would do the trick. Francis raises even more music ... hey boy hey girl, hey boy hey girl ... the bass pumping out of proportion, the plant is almost perfect, a Dolbear sounds crazy to even those who do not love the music really. About as Alex threw his life on the shoulders of parents, without even paying the fucking bills in his apartment. Yet they should try Francis of pity, but when the club makes the final stanza, the last piece of the infinite melody, the strength is superhuman. now has two weights less, press the button opening the gate and walk away without haste on the road, quiet and intimate as the most beautiful prayer he could say.
